Growing in Love #2 - Truest Love

Work to develop true love for others. 

 [this is part 2 of my Growing in Love Series - you can find part 1 HERE]

1 Corinthians 13:1-13

(the theme chapter for this series)

1 I may speak in the tongues of men, even angels; but if I lack love, I have become merely blaring brass or a cymbal clanging. 2 I may have the gift of prophecy, I may fathom all mysteries, know all things, have all faith - enough to move mountains; but if I lack love, I am nothing. 3 I may give away everything that I own, I may even hand over my body to be burned; but if I lack love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient and kind, not jealous, not boastful, 5 not proud, rude or selfish, not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not gloat over other people's sins but takes its delight in the truth. 7 Love always bears up, always trusts, always hopes, always endures. 8 Love never ends; but prophecies will pass, tongues will cease, knowledge will pass. 9 For our knowledge is partial, and our prophecy partial; 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, thought like a child, argued like a child; now that I have become a man, I have finished with childish ways. 12 For now we see obscurely in a mirror, but then it will be face to face. Now I know partly; then I will know fully, just as God has fully known me. 13 But for now, three things last trust, hope, love; and the greatest of these is love.

   So, first, a quick review of what LOVE really is:

God's Word says that Love is:

~ Patient

~ Kind

~ Content & Satisfied (not Jealous or Envious)

~ Modest (not Boastful)

~ Humble (not Proud)

~ Respectful and Nice (not Rude)

~ Selfless (not Selfish)

~ Calm & Easy going (not easily Angered)

~ Forgives and Forgets & Bears NO Grudges (keeps no Record of Wrongs)

~ Sorry when Others Sin (doesn't Gloat over Others' Sins)

~ Takes Delight in Truth

~ always Bears Up

~ always Trusts

~ always Hopes

~ always Endures

~ Alive Forever (Never ENDS)

   I think you will all agree with me that this is a hefty list for one 4-letter action verb. As such, I believe you would also agree with me that LOVE must be quite an important attribute in God's eyes. God ehorts us to love Him and our fellow man; in the Psalms and Proverbs there are many verse to be found about loving God and others; one of Yeshua's (Jesus') commands to the Disciples was that they "love one another" [John 13:34-35 & John 15:12 among others]. 
   Our Messiah even said that men would know we were His followers is we have love one for another. So, love isn't something we can take lightly - the world knowing that we are Yeshua's followers partially depends on it.

   Loving others isn't always easy. The verse wherein Yeshua says "love your enemies" comes to my mind. But, it isn't always our enemies that are hard to love - if we are honest with ourselves, the very members of our family fall into the "unloved" category from time to time. However, that is where the part of love that is especially "patient, kind, nice, selfless, forgiving, easy-going, and always endures" comes in.
   Some may say, "But, when my siblings are being mean, irritating, and hard to deal with - they don't deserve my love and kindness!" And I couldn't agree more. BUT, think about this - what if God withheld His blessed love from us when we slighted Him? Hmmmmm..... Even better, what if God withheld His love from us permanently for all our countless sins against Him? After all, we don't deserve His love and kindness - wretched sinners that we are. ~ He would be completely just in doing so, would He not? But He doesn't! That is how incredible His love is - the kind of love we must try to imitate. HalleluYah!
When it gets hard to love someone - consider about ^this^ and I'm sure you'll have some re-thinking to do;-)


So, Truest LOVE is:

#1 - PATIENT
   The first character trait of love is patience. Interesting, no? A rather hard trait to master, and yet it is the first one on the list of love. Hmm.
   Patience is one character trait the Lord has been Working on in me this year - and one that has (thanks be to God alone) grown in me. God has given me many "patience extension" tests that have really helped with my impatience.
   Patience is such an important characteristic of love - without patience, how can one love? They cannot for very long! If you have patience, you are saved from a world of trouble, believe me. It is much easier to love if you have patience.

#2 - KIND
   The next characteristic of love is no less important than the first - without kindness, there would be no love either. Kindness is essential for any relationship to survive & thrive. We must always be "kind and compassionate to one another" [Ephesians 4:32]

#3 - CONTENT & SATISFIED
   It would indeed be hard to have love if were were constantly unsatisfied, discontent, and jealous, would you not agree? If we are discontent with what we have, then it will be hard to see through our discontentment and truly love others - because we will be too focused on feeling sorry for ourselves.

#4 - MODEST
   This is referring to the modesty of speech & behavior - unobtrusive, shy (literally), discreet, unpretentious, etc. But, if you think about it - it can also be modesty of dress. If we love our brothers in Christ, we will not don anything that could make them stumble.

#5 - HUMBLE
   Raise your hand if you can have true love if you are full of pride? Hmm, no hands raised.....One cannot be an arrogant, prideful fool (yes, the Bible says fools are prideful Prov 14:3) and harbor true love for others. Pride is the opposite of love ~ Pride = ME first; Love = OTHERS first.
   The humble person thinks of others as better than himself.

#6 - RESPECTFUL & NICE
   With a lack of respect for others - we could not get far in life (think about what would happen if you didn't show respect for your parents......or...God!). If you love someone, you will respect them.

#7 - SELFLESS
   Selflessness goes hand-in-hand with love - and I'm sure you know the reasons why. If your love for someone is selfish - it's not love at all! One really good test to see if one truly loves others is by how selfless, or selfish they are.
   If you are selfless - think of others first, do what would be best for another person and not yourself - your love is genuine. Others must come before ourselves - a hard virtue to master, but, nevertheless, a very crucial one.

#8 - CALM & EASY-GOING
   Being slow to anger comes with great understanding the Proverbs 14:29 tells us. Love isn't easily angered - but rather slow to anger. Being slow to anger is a quality that the Bible says our Lord possesses [Psalm 86:15; 103:8; & 145:8]
   Also, I will note that it is quite noticeable if one is slow to anger - just as it is quite obvious if one is not. It is easy to respect those who are slow to anger.

#9 - FORGIVING & BEARS NO RECORD OF WRONGS
   Mat 6:14 & 15  For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
If you do not [or say you cannot] forgive, you do not love enough. There are SO many verses about forgiveness, Matt 18:21 & 22, Mark 11:25, Luke 6:37, and many others!
   Love doesn't bear records of wrongs either - which means love doesn't bear grudges. Grudges mentally hurt the ones who bear them - and since grudges often show through the attitude of the ones who bear them, they negatively effect others as well. Bearing grudges and harboring unforgiveness within also puts a hedge between you and the Father.
   [It is amazing how God chooses to work in my life! Yesterday, during our Midrash (study) there was a good deal of talk about forgiveness! I had already written the first few paragraphs in this post, which included a point about forgiveness, and I knew I would be writing this section on forgiving soon. So I was thrilled with how God orchestrated this at the Midrash!] 

#10 - SORRY WHEN OTHERS SIN
   I would never think someone loved another if they were happy when the other person sinned and/or was receiving punishment after they sinned. No way, no how! When others sin, we should feel bad/sorry for them and for what they did. AND - we should pray for them.

#11 - DELIGHTS IN TRUTH
   If we delight in truth, we will not enjoy "harmless" lies. If we did not delight in truth, we couldn't, in good conscience, call ourselves children of the Most High God - who IS truth! [sorry, that was a little off topic, but no less valid!]

#12 - ALWAYS BEARS UP, TRUSTS, HOPES, ENDURES
   At first, I was a little confused how "bears up" and "endures" were different, but, my Mom suggested I use the Greek/English New Testament we have and look up the Greek word translated as "bears up". I don't know Greek at all, so I cannot give you the word, but the word means "covers" - but it was translated as "bears" or "bears up". [translations are SO frustrating]
   So, love always covers - or - in perhaps a better translation, "in all things, love covers." I believe it goes back to the verse, Proverbs 10:12  "Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses."
      Love always trusts, or "in all things, love trusts". This means not jumping off tangents and assuming the worst about someone or something. We must trust, but not just anyone. For example, I love my parents and I trust that they have my best interests and welfare in mind when they make decisions that are tough for me to take. Spouses must trust each other and not (as in I Love Lucy) jump to conclusions that the other is cheating on them, etc.
   Love always hopes, or "in all things, love hopes". To hope is not, "oh, I hope I get to go to the mall today" - as I thought it meant until a few years ago. Because, to "put your hope in Adonai (the Lord)" would not make any sense that way. The best way I can explain it, hope is knowing, trusting, and expecting all together.
   Love always endures - "in all things, love endures". Now this is a tough one, to endure through everything! Yes, that is what love does. Yeshua (Jesus) the picture of Perfect Love, endured rejection, cruel words, harsh treatment, and an excruciatingly painful death, among other things.
   If He can endure all that - we *should* be able to endure little (comparably)  hardships in love.

#13 - ALIVE FOREVER
    Love NEVER ends! It should always be there - kept alive through everything. After all, that is how God's love toward us is - and our love should be patterned after His!
   

   I think one important thing to remember is what Christ said when a Pharisee asked Him....."Matthew 22: 36 "Rabbi, which of the mitzvot [commands] in the Torah [first 5 books of Moses] is the most important?" 37 He told him, "`You are to love ADONAI your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.' 38 This is the greatest and most important mitzvah [command]. 39 And a second is similar to it, `You are to love your neighbor as yourself.' 40 All of the Torah and the Prophets are dependent on these two mitzvot." 

If we truly love God with all our heart, soul, and strength we will do our best to live as HE wants us to and we will do what  HE tells us.
If we love our neighbor as ourselves we would not do anything to harm or offend others - we would do them only good. We would be "patient and kind, not jealous, not boastful, not proud, rude or selfish, not easily angered, and keep no record of wrongs. Not gloat over other people's sins but take delight in the truth.  Always cover, always trust, always hope, always endure - NEVER end"
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Thank you for taking the time to read today! I hope this article has blessed you in some way.

For now, this is the last Growing in Love article - there might be more added to the series at a later date, though.

Shalom Aleichem, Chaverim!

(Peace be unto you, friends!)

October 2012 Guest Post

This month's guest post comes to us from Britt.

   Britt blogs over at Encouragement for Everyday Struggles & Designed to Inspire.

Joy

   Hello, this is Britt from Encouragement For Everyday Struggles. Mandie mentioned to me that this month's Guest Post was to be about Joy. Thanks Mandie for asking me to guest post!! 

   To be honest, for me being joyful often depends greatly on my circumstances and the type of day I am going through, sorry to say. Being joyful in hard times is something I think we all have trouble from time to time. Yes, we may say being joyful is easy to do, but when hard times come and trying circumstances arise it is hard to find the “joy” deep within us and know that we can be happy even through so much suffering. God tells us directly from 1 Thessalonians 5:16 that we should be “thankful always” and be happy for what we are going through. This may not come easily to us- and I don’t think it is supposed to. We are sinful and don’t have the right motives all the time. I think that God allows us to go through things to test our faith so we grow closer to Him and lean more on Him. 

   Being a joyful person really does help us spiritually, emotionally and physically. When we are joyful it makes our whole outlook on life seem change and also is shown to help increase our health. (Proverbs 17:22- A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones). 

   One thing that we should try to do more often is be joyful in the circumstances God has placed us in and not just look at all the bad things in our life. Yes, things may be bad and hard right now and it may be difficult getting up each morning, but we have so many things to be thankful for- a family, a home, a God who loves us and especially an eternal home waiting for us. 

   We have so much to be thankful and joyful about! Don’t forget how much you have in your life that you can be rejoicing over today- thank God that He has allowed you to have another day on the earth to help inspire others and also grow closer to Him. : )

Thanks Mandie for letting me guest post!!! Such a great topic to write on!

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Thank you, Britt for guest posting here! You always write such encouraging posts ;-)

Weekly Bible Study Linkup #1 - Confidence

I am linking up with Britt for her Weekly Bible Study. Week #1; Subject, Confidence.

Rules/Info for the linkup:

1. Attach button in your post

2. Answer the questions (if you don't want to answer all of them that is fine- you can just pick a few that stand out to you!)

3. Feel free to write anything that you learned or thought was neat

4. Please link your post up with your answers to the questions

5. Post these rules on your blog post 

6. You can comment on other people's posts and what they have learned

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QUESTIONS:

1. What is your definition of confidence.

Confidence, how I understand it, is the feeling of peace and assurance one can have as they go through life, and various difficult situations. It is knowing that you can do something. Confidence is like self-assurance in a way.

2. List some things our society put confidence in. Now read the following passages: Psalm 71:5-8 and Phil. 3:2-9. How would you describe the difference between the confidence which comes from the world and the confidence we have in Christ?

Skin-Deep Beauty, the Republican Party, the Democratic Party, Pastors, Diets, Exercise programs, etc, etc.

God is the One in whom we can (and must) have complete confidence. All else can be equated with garbage (Philippians 3) compared to what we have in Messiah.

The world chooses to put it's confidence in things that are vapors, things that swiftly pass away. But, as Believers, we must put our complete confidence in Christ and what we have in Him - these will not pass away.

3. What area in your life do you lack confidence in?

Hmmmm.....Though there are a few areas wherein I lack confidence, I would say that in the area of witnessing (sharing my faith), is one area in which my confidence is lacking. 

I doubt I'll know what to say, how to say it, and when to say things.

4. How do you think we best overcome our lack of confidence?

Prayer, reading God's Holy Word, and trusting in our Lord.

5. What are some verses that stand out to you relating to confidence? Are there any that have boosted your self confidence?

Romans 8: 35 - 39 

35 Who will separate us from the love of the Messiah? Trouble? Hardship? Persecution? Hunger? Poverty? Danger? War? 36 As the Tanakh puts it, "For your sake we are being put to death all day long, we are considered sheep to be slaughtered." 37 No, in all these things we are superconquerors, through the one who has loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor other heavenly rulers, neither what exists nor what is coming, 39 neither powers above nor powers below, nor any other created thing will be able to separate us from the love of God which comes to us through the Messiah Yeshua, our Lord.

6. Why do you feel confidence is important in a person's life?

Without confidence, my life would be as shaky as a fiddler on the roof! [seriously now]

Without confidence, I couldn't accomplish anything great, could not face things that I feared, could not be a strong Believer!

7.  How confident do you think you are (rank from 1-10, 10 being the highest)

7 or 8  (though about two years ago I was more of a 5)

8. Would your friends describe you as a confident person?

I think they would say that I am a fairly confident person.

9. Do you think there is a difference between confidence and arrogance?

Absolutely! Arrogance is pride, boldness, and haughty demeanor all rolled into one. Confidence is having full trust,  believing in yourself and in your abilities.

10. Have you had trouble with confidence in your life before?

Oh, yes, definitely. In many areas, shapes, and forms. 

Fortunately, I have grown in confidence throughout these past few years - something I am very grateful for. 

Somewhere down the line, I want to share some of my "lack of confidence" experiences.

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The last thing I wish to say is this:

Confidence is something to be learned and acquired - it doesn't come quickly and without hardships.

Great Bible Study this week, Britt!

Growing in Love - #1 ~ Showing Love

What is love? [See verses 4-8a below]

This is the first installment of a series I am titling, "Growing in Love". 
In this installment I am just laying down some basic points of what love is and how you can show love. 
The next article will be more in-depth.

1 I may speak in the tongues of men, even angels; but if I lack love, I have become merely blaring brass or a cymbal clanging. 2 I may have the gift of prophecy, I may fathom all mysteries, know all things, have all faith - enough to move mountains; but if I lack love, I am nothing. 3 I may give away everything that I own, I may even hand over my body to be burned; but if I lack love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient and kind, not jealous, not boastful, 5 not proud, rude or selfish, not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not gloat over other people's sins but takes its delight in the truth. 7 Love always bears up, always trusts, always hopes, always endures. 8 Love never ends; but prophecies will pass, tongues will cease, knowledge will pass. 9 For our knowledge is partial, and our prophecy partial; 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, thought like a child, argued like a child; now that I have become a man, I have finished with childish ways. 12 For now we see obscurely in a mirror, but then it will be face to face. Now I know partly; then I will know fully, just as God has fully known me. 13 But for now, three things last trust, hope, love; and the greatest of these is love.

So, in a quick summary, God's Word says that Love is:

~ Patient

~ Kind

~ Content & Satisfied (not Jealous)

~ Modest (not Boastful)

~ Humble (not Proud)

~ Respectful and Nice (not Rude)

~ Selfless (not Selfish)

~ Calm & Easy going (not easily Angered)

~ Forgives and Forgets & Bears NO Grudges (keeps no Record of Wrongs)

~ Sorry when Others Sin (doesn't Gloat over Others' Sins)

~ Takes Delight in Truth

~ always Bears Up

~ always Trusts

~ always Hopes

~ always Endures

~ Alive Forever (Never ENDS)

I don't know about you, but, whenever I read 1 Corinthians 13 I am convicted that my love doesn't look like that. Whenever I read this beautiful chapter, I ask God to help my love to look like this. This chapter also reminds me of how Christ loves us – He was the perfect example of how to love.

After thinking about this subject (one I believe God has laid upon my heart lately) I have listed some practical ways to Love:

*this is in no way a complete list - just some suggestions as to how every one of us can show love to others*

Loving God:

By this we know that we love the children of God,when we love God, and keep his commandments. - 1 John 5:2

&

And you are to love ADONAI your God with all your heart, all your being and all your resources. - Deuteronomy 6:5

~ To show God we love Him, we must keep His commands, which can be found in the Torah (first 5 books of the Bible). SO, to grow in love – we must practice keeping His commands.

~ Also, to show anyone that we love them, we must spend time with them each day. With God, in prayer and in His Word. SO, to grow in love – we must spent time with Him each day.

~ We must remember when praying, not to just talk to God BUT to actually listen for God to speak to us. If we are the ones always doing the talking – we loose our opportunity to hear from the Father. SO, to grow in love – we must listen to Him.

~ If we follow His perfect will for our lives & do what He wants us to do – we show that we love him. SO, to grow in love – we must follow His will, not ours.

Loving Parents:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.  Honor thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)  That it may be well with thee, and thou may live long on the earth. - Ephesians 6:1-3

~ Honor & Obey them! Accept their commands and constructive criticisms, don't keep them at arms length at all times, don't rebel against them. Honor and obey them cheerfully - then it will go well with you.
~ Talk - really talk with them. Parents are supposed to be our friends.
~ Spend time with them! Cook with your mom, paint with your dad ~ something!You won't have them with you forever.
~ Thank them for raising you, feeding you, clothing you, teaching you, being there for you, etc.
~ Talk well of them to your friends (no grumbling to Sue, "My dad is SO tough on me!"). Speak respectfully about your parents - even (especially) to strangers.

Loving Your Spouse:

Wives should submit to their husbands as they do to the Lord; because the husband is head of the wife, just as the Messiah, as head of the Messianic Community, is himself the one who keeps the body safe. Just as the Messianic Community submits to the Messiah, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. As for husbands, love your wives, just as the Messiah loved the Messianic Community, indeed, gave himself up on its behalf, - Ephesians 5:22-25

~ Spend quality time with them, talk, really and truly talk with them. After marriage, your spouse *should* be your best friend and truest confident.
~ Do things together as often as possible!
~ Wives - submit to your husbands, do special things for them. Honor your husband in your speech, conduct, and dress. Yes, dress in ways your husband especially likes. Never belittle your husband - in the sight of others especially.
~ Husbands - love your wives as Christ loves us, His Bride. Even the smallest things you do to show her how much you care will be appreciated.

Loving Siblings:

Don't grumble against one another, brothers, so that you won't come under condemnation - look! the Judge is standing at the door! - James 5:9

~ Spend time with them - [really, this cannot be emphasized enough!] learn their likes, dislikes, and do things they like with and for them. Talk with them, play with them even if it's just your little 4 year old brother who only wants to talk of his Lego creation and play stick-sword fights.
~ If you have younger siblings, try and understand them, and don't provoke or belittle them - it will mean a lot to them. [remember, you were once their age]
~ Give loving advice, and have heart-to-heart talks on important subjects.
~ Don't talk bad of them to your friends - please, don't! Just as with everyone - if you cannot say something nice, don't say anything at all. - And include them where they can be included.
~ Don't bicker for no reason! Love is not Rude!
~ Build each other up. Siblings are notorious [and quite good actually] at tearing each other down - a mean sport they shouldn't engage in.

Loving Extended Family (saved and unsaved):

But treat the Messiah as holy, as Lord in your hearts while remaining always ready to give a reasoned answer to anyone who asks you to explain the hope you have in you - yet with humility and fear, keeping your conscience clear, so that when you are spoken against, those who abuse the good behavior flowing from your union with the Messiah may be put to shame. - 1 Peter 3:15-16

~ Do things for them
~ Tell them about your Faith & behave blamelessly
~ Never talk ill of your family to extended family members [honestly, that is one of the worst things you could talk about with them!]
~ Be there when they need you
~ Show gratitude to them [especially generous grandparents!]

Loving Friends:

A friend shows his friendship at all times -it is for adversity that [such] a brother is born. - Proverbs 17:17

~ Talk well of them when they aren't around. Just as with everyone - if you cannot say something nice, don't say anything at all.
~ Do what they want to do - don't just follow your every will and whim. No one likes a bossy person. [one of the easiest ways to lose your friends is to be bossy]
~ Build each other up.

Loving Fellow Believers:

We, for our part, know that we have passed from death to life because we keep loving the brothers. The person who fails to keep on loving is still under the power of death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him. The way that we have come to know love is through his having laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers! - 1 John 3:14-16

~ Be hospitable to them
~ Ask about their lives - show genuine interest in what God is doing with/for them.
~ Listen to them - especially the older, wiser Believers who have much knowledge to give.

Loving The Lost:

But treat the Messiah as holy, as Lord in your hearts while remaining always ready to give a reasoned answer to anyone who asks you to explain the hope you have in you - yet with humility and fear, keeping your conscience clear, so that when you are spoken against, those who abuse the good behavior flowing from your union with the Messiah may be put to shame. - 1 Peter 3:15-16

~ Witness to them
~ Be kind, and helpful to them
~ Be ready always to give them the reasons for the hope that is in you.

The most important thing of all is - PRAY - pray for all these various groups of people. 
Your prayers for the individuals in each group will be quite different, but, prayer is so powerful; and we are commanded to pray without ceasing.

I hope this gives some practical ways to love others. 

Though we all know of ways to love others - it is always good to have little reminders now and then.

Blessings!


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Side Note: Thanks to all who voted on my poll! I have read and documented the results so I can refer to them for awhile whenever I am trying to decide what to post on. ;-)
The Top 5 are:

Emotional & Physical Purity - 5 (votes)

Waiting & Delighting in the Lord - 5

Sibling Matters - 5

Growing in Love - 5

Selflessness - 5